Acting and Re-acting: The Cost of Self-Awareness

Posted on May 24, 2008
Filed Under Awareness, Fake Culture |

Sometimes it almost feels as though I am preaching when it comes to the subject of awareness - specifically self awareness. I tend to have this personal drive, and perhaps on some level even a complex about the subject. I know this goes back, as many such issues do - to my childhood, particularly events at school which involved being bullied and so on. Events which essentially forced me into a kind of perpetual self-awareness. That sort of thing can go too far, you can end up watching yourself a bit too closely, becoming very self conscious. So in the end it becomes about learning a balance between living life and being aware of life.

I have noticed quite often how so many people barely seem to live life - let alone have an awareness of it. They kinda just tread through it, taking each next step as a matter of course. Sometimes when I look in their eyes it really is soul wrenching; it looks as though they have giving up on something essential. Their words and actions deny this - even as their spirit cries out. The spirit and soul crave freedom and often spontaneity - excessive routine tend to shackle both.

In a society that is built upon excessive routine it’s not so hard to see why so many people feel trapped. Yet I always come back to the point of self-awareness. No matter how much we feel imprisoned by a lifestyle of immoveable routine, it only serves to compound the issue when we give into denial; “That’s just how things are.”, “You have to work to live.” In the end we force our mind to conform to its circumstances, and thus we live in denial. It really is quite the opposite of self-awareness…we literally hammer the door shut on that notion. Naturally this invites a life of reaction rather than a life of action. Simply living according to whatever circumstances the excessive routines of our daily life dictates.

The problem is that self-awareness under these conditions brings a price; as Cypher said in the Matrix ‘Ignorance is bliss.’ Perhaps in some terms that idea has merit, but then can a life of ignorance bring with it a sense of self-fulfilment and completion? The problem as I see it, is that ignorance is a wilful suppression of the truth - it is open denial. We may try and hide truth from ourselves, and no matter how many times we tell ourselves ‘That’s just how it is’, it doesn’t mean we accept that idea.

The other side of the coin is nievity which is the lack of awareness of truth. I think it is perfectly possible to be happy and contended in nievity, because it is a natural circumstance. It lacks the bullheadedness of ignorance.

My problem with ignorance and denial is that they perpetuate the idea of things being unchangeable, they enforce the idea of giving up on ones circumstances. Ignorance and denial are the slayers of hope. Self-awareness - even if it is difficult to face - brings with it hope, and the idea that everything is changeable.

Comments

2 Responses to “Acting and Re-acting: The Cost of Self-Awareness”

diskless wonder on June 22nd, 2008 6:15 pm

“..Ignorance and denial are the slayers of hope. Self-awareness - even if it is difficult to face - brings with it hope, and the idea that everything is changeable.”

Or - maybe it brings the realization that in actuality we are even more hopelessly screwed than we had previously ever imagined.
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Marcus on June 22nd, 2008 7:28 pm

That too.
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